linkingup | NETWORK: @peach0341 (anonymous) [post soujuurou's wild ride]

What would you consider the most unforgivable thing that a person could do to you? Something that someone could do, that they could never take back?

If it has been done to you, what happened? How did you treat that person afterward, if you kept in contact with them? If you didn't, do you regret ever severing off from them?

Have you done anything unforgivable? How did people respond to that--did they let you get a word in edge-wise to explain, or did they abandon you? Did you have to find your own way afterwards? How did it go for you, if so?

Do you think there's anything that one can do to earn forgiveness, depending on the severity of what happened? Do they deserve it? Does it depend? And is there a certain point that someone's allowed to give up on trying to find it, and should just stop trying to be good?

I'm curious as to what everyone's answers will be. Please don't give anymore info than you're comfortable with; these are just things that have been on my mind, lately. And please don't be rude to each other.

[this seems. infinitely more like a stream of conscious than anything actually coherent, but there's at least an attempt at maintaining some modicum of privacy. have at. be it on main or giving yourself a nice plurk-style anon-name, go for it.]

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[Given that Ryouma's response to having to face Izou down was to let him take a free swing at him with his sword... Yeah not idea for Sayaka.]

Like I said it's complicated Before I came here I was always threatening to kill him Whenever I yelled at him or hit him he'd just take it I guess he thought I had a right to be mad at him even though it's not like he personally killed me But it's hard to stay mad at someone you grew up with especially when they act like that

...It sounds like he regrets what he did, at the very least. Though I can't imagine that regretting alone is enough to repair a bridge that's been broken like that, after all. He probably feels like he deserves it. Or something.

But your feelings...I think they're understandable too. Sort of. Stuff like this is hard for me, but I can sort of connect the dots and see what it is you're meaning.

[She wonders what it'd be like, to be that forgiving.]

I think when I get back I'm gonna clock him one more time and tell him he's gotta tell me plainly what he's thinking because I ain't smart enough to figure it out on my own. Telling people how you really feel is hard as hell but I think sometimes it's the only thing that can fix shit.

Being honest really is the biggest curse in the world. I don't blame you for wanting that from him, though; he owes you that at minimum, and to not keep quiet about things.

...I hope you are able to get the answers you want from him, at the end of it all, Izou-san.

[Fuck it. No sense in hiding anymore. She really does hope that, through and through.]

[Ah... it was knife-chan this whole time.]

I'm hoping that me being honest with him makes him do the same. I think he knows I'm not actually gonna kill him but probably thinks I don't wanna talk about it neither Cept now I'm worried what kinda situation a girl like you'd had to deal with to be worrying about this kinda thing

Talking will definitely be a good path forward, then. It sounds like you both are stuck in an indecisive place, so...here's hoping that it goes well for you both. I'm rooting for you, okay?

[There's a long pause between that and the next response. A lot of it is just...not really knowing what to say, because she hates the idea of talking almost as much as Izou and Ryouma seem to.

But...]

It's...something I have a hard time talking about. And really, it's going to sound utterly unbelievable even if I try. It's also not a very pleasant subject, because it involves people my age being locked in a place that...

Made us try to kill each other.

[Typing that last portion took a hell of a lot out of her. Admitting this to anyone was a huge step, but she's...at least trying.]

[Izou really can't find anything too far fetched now that he know how far off course the path of history can get in Lost Belts. This may as well have happened in some weird fucked up timeline, why not.]

The hell? I believe you, but what the hell reason could they have for doing something like that?

That's what I wondered, too. A bunch of my classmates and I, we were originally going to go to this gifted school that's been around for hundreds of years--people who graduate from there are said to be able to have a successful life no matter what.

The one who kidnapped us thought it was funny. That we were what he called 'the world's hope', and thus, he wanted to fill us with despair by making us kill each other.

...And yes, that is completely the reason.

... Damn that's fucked up. Musta been some real miserable bastard ta get a kick out of that. Seems like you aughta ask the goddess ta go somewhere else when we're done here insteada back home.

I plan to, when the time comes. I want to prove I'm useful to her before asking her for something so selfish.

I'm not sure where I'd go, but...I think anywhere would be better than here.

...It's funny. The first person I ever told about this, he offered me his home in an instant despite not knowing me, nor the things I'd done. Is it...really just that easy for you all? To trust like that...?

I mean it depends on the person I think Who was it that offered you that?

It was Fray.

...He's not the sort of person to lie, and I found it surprising that he was willing to trust me so easily, after how standoffish he seemed at first.

Yeah, that tracks. I guess that's just the kinda guy he is. Like, I almost killed him when we sparred and he wasn't mad at all. Doesn't make any goddamn sense.

It really is kind of strange, isn't it? I would've never expected it from him, but that must come from the kind of knight he is. Maybe he's used to it. It sounded like Eorzea was a place that kind of needed you to be ready for anything...

I am glad that you two seem to be friends despite it all. He seems to be at home in a fight, so maybe he was happy that you gave him one.

Hah, I guess so. We really got all sorts of weirdos here I think most of us would agree that whatever you might've done before in that shitty situation ain't much of a problem. I've killed loads of people and it ain't really a problem fer anyone here.

I'm starting to understand that, now. It's a little startling, if I can be honest. Other than this, I came from a mostly normal world, but...

Thank you, sincerely. For listening to me and hearing all of this. I think I understand you all a little bit better now. And I guess it's good to know I'm not alone, in any of this.

...You're all very precious to me, and I want to at least do good by all of you. I think...that's the conclusion I'm coming to.

No problem, you listened ta me too, didn't you? I ain't used to making friends like this, so it's been a lot of learning for me too. I guess maybe Braphine wasn't a complete idiot in picking all of us for this job after all, huh?

NETWORK: @peach0341 (anonymous) [post soujuurou's wild ride]

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