NETWORK: @peach0341 (anonymous) [post soujuurou's wild ride]

[destage]

What would you consider the most unforgivable thing that a person could do to you? Something that someone could do, that they could never take back?

If it has been done to you, what happened? How did you treat that person afterward, if you kept in contact with them? If you didn't, do you regret ever severing off from them?

Have you done anything unforgivable? How did people respond to that--did they let you get a word in edge-wise to explain, or did they abandon you? Did you have to find your own way afterwards? How did it go for you, if so?

Do you think there's anything that one can do to earn forgiveness, depending on the severity of what happened? Do they deserve it? Does it depend? And is there a certain point that someone's allowed to give up on trying to find it, and should just stop trying to be good?

I'm curious as to what everyone's answers will be. Please don't give anymore info than you're comfortable with; these are just things that have been on my mind, lately. And please don't be rude to each other.

[this seems. infinitely more like a stream of conscious than anything actually coherent, but there's at least an attempt at maintaining some modicum of privacy. have at. be it on main or giving yourself a nice plurk-style anon-name, go for it.]

Comments

[destage]

It would be. It...was.

[Sayaka isn't usually one for nervous ticks, though she just seems to be a rather nervous person in general without any sort of mask on. But if Fray looks for it, he'll notice something in particular about her right wrist--one she has a habit of rubbing at, even now.

There's a rather large bruise on it, and she goes silent for a bit as she considers everything. She doesn't want to tell him this. It isn't relevant. She shouldn't cloud any sort of judgement.

...]

...I remember my vision fading, but I still had a little bit of energy in me. I've never been a particularly smart kid, but...I wanted to do something, for Naegi-kun. I...

I used my own blood to trace out Kuwata-kun's first name, on the wall behind me. He was panicking and distracted, and I was barely thinking straight when I was writing it. It probably looked more like a series of numbers, than anything actually readable. But I was bleeding out, and I didn't want him to win.

...I didn't want Naegi-kun to get hurt, for my own actions. I think.

[bloodweapon]

[...Ah. She's been hiding that this whole time, hasn't she? Fray's fingers twitch for a moment, like he's going to move, but he settles, eyes still fixated on her wrist. There are more important things to address first.]

I can only imagine what it was like. I'm sorry that you had to go through something like that, Maizono; I'm sorry that you were put in such a position to begin with.

[It's soft, not quite gentle but approaching it.]

To think that you were holding onto all this all this time... I'm sorry I couldn't have been of more help any sooner. Thank you for trusting me with your story - I won't tell anyone anything you've told me here tonight.

[destage]

[...]

It's nothing you need to apologize for, Fray.

[There's a bit of a realization, at this point. That she's dropped the respectful '-san' she always used to keep a distance from others with him. That she's used because of an insistence on politeness, and from the start, she hasn't even used it properly on his last name.

It's a thought that she discards easier than she would've thought. Fray is Fray. Fray is Fray, and it feels right. That's what matters.]

I...if I had my way of it, nobody would have ever known. I kept trying, trying, trying to be someone perfect and helpful and kind, and yet it feels like every time we're put into a situation of true stress, I feel like I keep cracking further. Everyone can see it. Everyone can see the delicate little girl I've been trying to hide this entire time, and I don't like being perceived so clearly by people. It's uncomfortable, it reminds me of how my fans have always acted, always so overly familiar, using my first name like they know me. When I've been put on a pedestal so high, I can't even see the people I want to make smile. The people I wanted to inspire...

I keep wondering how much more I can take, and it all just...this place just reminds me of a normal life I've never gotten the chance to have, and I...I hate it.

...But I still can't bring myself to hate the Goddess for it. I can't hate any of you, for seeing me as I am. It's the closest I've ever felt to something normal.

[Sayaka finally looks at Fray at that, her expression uncertain.]

...With all of that being said, I...could I ask you for a favor?

[bloodweapon]

[She's struggled so much, he thinks. Sayaka has been fighting this whole time, and now that she no longer has to fight, she's not sure what to do with herself. She doesn't have to prove herself here. She doesn't have to be someone else, someone that everyone else wants to see. She can just be herself, Sayaka Maizono, whomever that might be to all the different weirdoes the Goddess has collected here.

It's an identity crisis he understands better than most would, he thinks. After all, he doesn't have to be "Fray Myste" any longer, now does he? What would it be like to walk that path with her, to figure out who he truly is when given a life all his own?

A terrifying and tantalizing thought in equal measure, but not the point right now.]

Of course, Maizono. You can ask me for anything, you know.

[He may not be able to grant it, but he would be a fool not to offer it.]

[destage]

...I don't think it's a secret that I trust you. I don't know feelings well and I could try to ascribe so much I've seen on TV to try and find it but--I don't want to do that. I'm going off what's in front of me. You've always been here for me and patient with me, and you're the only one I've told about this. I can only think of one other person I'd want to tell this all to, at least right now, but...

I don't...want to run anymore. From being seen by others, from...being. Even if I don't know the first thing about that. We're...kind of similar like that, I think? Maybe, at least.

[Sayaka shakes her head. And her expression goes...surprisingly determined.]

Could I...ask you to call me Sayaka, from now on?

[bloodweapon]

[...She really has come such a long way from the girl she was at the start of all of this, hasn't she?]

Very well. Sayaka it is. I'm happy to call you as such.

[She had to explain it to him initially, why she preferred to use her last name, but it was something he understood and accepted. It isn't lost on him that using her first name is a big step for her, and Fray finds himself proud of her. She can likely hear it in his voice, as he's done nothing to try to hide it.]

You're right. We do have quite a bit in common, in that regard. Neither of us has truly had the chance to simply be ourselves, for one reason or another.

[Vastly different reasons, from vastly different worlds, but still the sentiment remains.]

Though I may not be the first one to bear the name "Fray Myste", it is a name I have decided to make mine, for the time being. I intend to enjoy my time here and learn to truly... be. I trust you'll walk this path with me, then, Sayaka?

[destage]

[Sayaka listens, and she feels her expression brighten with each word of Fray's that she hears. The tone, there's no caveat to it. There's no caveat to the proud tone he is of her, at least, not one she can visibly see. She's always prided herself on her ability to read people, and yet...

She finds herself smiling--the expression is awkward, strange, but deeply appreciative and warm and she feels herself rub at her eyes a bit as she chuckles.]

...Mind reading was my old shtick, you know! Did you really think I was going to let you walk through this all by yourself?

No chance.

[Sayaka moves to hug Fray again, but it's with care and gentleness--there's no greed in the gesture and she'll back off if it's unwanted, but it's...

Freeing. It's freeing.]

...No matter where you end up at the end of your own path, Fray, I'm not going anywhere. You've stuck with me through my worst, through all of thus fumbling--the least I can do is...

...No, that's not right. I want to support you, like you've supported me. I want to know who "Fray Myste" will end up at the end of this path, and I'll gladly follow you down it until the end.

Promise. And...thank you. For everything...

[...That comes with a little bit of an unintended yawn, and Fray might feel her briefly unwrap an arm to rub at her eyes a bit--she really did tucker herself out today...]

[bloodweapon]

[It gets a scoff from Fray and a roll of those golden eyes, but it's good-natured rather than sarcastic. He doesn't mind the hug at all, wrapping his arms around her easily. It still probably isn't comfortable at all, but there's no hesitance in the gesture.]

I'm glad, then. That we can support one another on this path we walk. Let's see where it takes us, shall we?

[But for now... there's really only one place that path should lead, isn't there?]

Let's return back to the dorms. Best hold on tight.

[And with that - said with the sort of teasing that implies he's about to do something dumb - Fray moves to lift Sayaka in a bridal carry. Ready to head back to the dorms on your dark knight chariot??]

[destage]

[Oh! Sayaka seems a little surprised, but it's dampened a touch by the tiredness--even so, it gets a small giggle out of her nonetheless, and she wraps an arm around his neck to support herself. Best not to make this difficult for him.]

Absolutely. Lead the way, Fray...

[...

It absolutely doesn't take long for Sayaka to fall asleep in the safety of being carried by him, and it's a very deep sleep. Enough to ignore any disaster going on elsewhere!

She can deal with the guilt of that in the morning--]