yoon's palace

[strawsandals]

I thought I told you to leave me alone.

Comments

[beathollow]

...

I. I have a lot of thoughts and feelings on the subject.

[supherb]

I didn't think anything bad about it! I agree! I was just surprised by how you said it, like... Wow.

[Wheeze.]

[beathollow]

Was it strange...?

[supherb]

No! Nonono, it was, um... Cool. Like, you tell 'em!

[beathollow]

... I've never been called "cool" before...

[supherb]

W-Well, now you have. Because you sounded so cool.

[beathollow]

... Ehe. Thank you, Arven.

( he even gets the elusive real, legit, warm smile! this will beat the cold weather for sure- (no) )

[supherb]

[You joke but Arven does feel warmer after seeing that smile.]

Heheh. Just being honest.

[beathollow]

Compliments feel different here... I wonder why that is.

[supherb]

Hopefully it's a good kind of different...

[Arven she literally thanked you for it.]

[beathollow]

It is. It feels... ... My classmates are sincere, but- things here feel more impactful. Or maybe genuine...?

[supherb]

Ohhh... I think I get what you mean. Like they're coming from the heart and not just 'cause it's polite.

[beathollow]

... I don't think they're being polite. Not with how they talk about me. But they don't know me. I... act really different back home. But it's hard to keep up the energy, so to be honest, I haven't bothered here. I think most of the people I speak to here know me better than anyone at school.

[supherb]

...Oh, right. I remember now. Your classmates are kinda crappy, aren't they?

[Mayfuyu said they feared her, whatever the heck that means. So he's just calling them crappy.]

What d'you mean you act differently, though...?

1/2

[beathollow]

No, they're all very kind. Even Ootori, who's scared of me, still tries to make me laugh... ... This might sound conceited, but I'm very popular as someone to admire. My grades are the top of my class, I'm athletic, and I'm personable enough that I've never heard a negative word about me.

... But, being on a pillar like that... means that they don't know me. I'm above them, so they could never be worthy of my actual friendship, in their eyes.

( and it's such a very high pillar.

as for his question... )

2/2

[beathollow]

( she immediately switches the tone and energy in her voice, to something unnatural at this point to the people here. )

Well, it wouldn't do for me to upset others with my gloominess, right? And proper students don't worry those around her either. Not that I would trust anyone with the truth!

As far as anyone back home- save for my music group- is aware, I'm just a good girl.

[supherb]

[Something about the mask that Mafuyu so effortlessly puts on makes Arven deeply uncomfortable. Why would someone have to pretend so much around others?]

I... [He doesn't know what to say at first.] I guess...since you're not acting here and no one knows your deal back home, it's easier to just know you for you.

But now that I've got a glimpse... [He laughs awkwardly.] I think I'd have been a little intimidated by that version of you, too. Probably wouldn't have wanted anything to do with you.

Good thing I got to meet the real Mafuyu instead.

[beathollow]

( ... the real mafuyu... what sort of person does he see? she desperately wants to ask, almost does-

its a shame that the anon messages were random, or he could perhaps connect apple tea and the apple online. )

...

I-

( ... wait- )

Why am I crying...?

[supherb]

[Arven would also like to know why she's crying--

His heart sinks. He's messed up big time, hasn't he?]

M-Mafuyu? Shoot, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to--

[He quickly shrugs off his massive backpack and fishes out a napkin for her. It's the least he can do.]

I can...I can go--

[beathollow]

N-no! No, you didn't- I-

( she needs to calm down, oh god. )

You didn't do anything wrong. I just...

...

I've been living really badly, haven't I? And- I never thought anyone would- want me like this, other than the girls- I'm sorry.

[supherb]

[He turns back to face her, shoulders sagging a little as the stress wanes.

...]

I dunno if it's bad, but it sure sounds exhausting. And...lonely.

[beathollow]

... It is. But I can't stop.

[supherb]

[There's only one thing to say to that, right?]

...Why?

[beathollow]

It's- complicated. I'm from a well-to-do family and failing to meet the social expectations of me would bring backlash to my family. And... have you ever stacked things in a tower? When it all comes down, the piece at the top often winds up damaged or flung far away. I-

If I were to stop, I don't think I could survive the fall.

( and that's not even getting to her mother- )

[supherb]

...I think I get it. I mean, I can't imagine having to deal with the pressure of expectation. It's like...the opposite of what I had, I guess. [They really did have it terrible but for completely different reasons.] But I get the tower thing.

Thing is...for me, the tower already came down. But hey, I'm still standing, even if I'm picking up the pieces.

[He didn't mean to get deep with this at all, but the words just kept coming. Maybe it's that anon post that's gotten him thinking more lately.

But once he realizes he's been rambling, he shakes his head.]

S-Sorry, I swear I had a point to this. It's that, well, I'm not wishing for your own tower to collapse. But if it does, I think you'd survive too. It doesn't sound like you're happy living in it anyway.