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mid-week 11; un: monday
[ With the regression of the city, working at Sunset Theater has quickly become less enjoyable than it used to be. Though the cast remembers the rapport McGillis had built with them, even if they're more standoffish now. And it's not as though McGillis had placed much stock in his interpersonal relationships to the random citizens, but... the shift in atmosphere serves as a tangible reminder. That this is temporary. That this world is susceptible to insane levels of mind manipulation. That he wants to leave.
Leave and... do what? That's the question that has haunted McGillis for weeks now, and the countdown is mercilessly continuing. Soon Braphine will release them from her hold, one way or another. Soon, he'll have to know. And so will everyone else. ]
Just a little over two weeks until we're free from this, if Braphine really keeps her word and the God of Conflict doesn't swallow up all her power. Until then we'll doubtlessly face a number of additional challenges and hassles, but while we're still in the quiet before the storm...
Are you going home to your own worlds after this? Or will you take Braphine up on her offer and come along with one of your 'bonds'? What is your world like? What is making you return? What is making you abandon it?
And if you're like me and cannot return to where you came from no matter what, maybe the answers can give you some perspective.
Leave and... do what? That's the question that has haunted McGillis for weeks now, and the countdown is mercilessly continuing. Soon Braphine will release them from her hold, one way or another. Soon, he'll have to know. And so will everyone else. ]
Just a little over two weeks until we're free from this, if Braphine really keeps her word and the God of Conflict doesn't swallow up all her power. Until then we'll doubtlessly face a number of additional challenges and hassles, but while we're still in the quiet before the storm...
Are you going home to your own worlds after this? Or will you take Braphine up on her offer and come along with one of your 'bonds'? What is your world like? What is making you return? What is making you abandon it?
And if you're like me and cannot return to where you came from no matter what, maybe the answers can give you some perspective.
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[ Not to mention how difficult it would be to shake the feeling of giving up. Leaving instead of fighting for his world. Is it really okay? To just leave like that? ]
But we don't even know if that'll be possible. Mm. I bet McGillis wouldn't be surprised at all. Izou would shit himself. Though Arven's kinda like a little brother to me at this point? And I know you see Mafuyu as a daughter...
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[The struggle with leaving isn't something Celeste can relate to - but it's not something he'll diminish, either. He suspects a great many people from Eli's world would skip out if they could... but that might just make the feeling worse. Not to mention those who would be upset at him taking the chance.
It's tricky. It hurts he can't offer help with it.]
That's a bond, too. The least Braphine can do is help you to send a letter, if you decide to not go home. Aah, I'll get him one of these days. [He's not entirely sure what it'll take, but he's determined.]
I do... and they'll be living on their own. I cannot help but worry about them, even if I know they'll be fine, you know?
no subject
[ It does, unfortunately, beg the question of if Eli even should try leaving his old world behind. ]
Shit, Celeste, what if it's a bad idea for me even to try going elsewhere? Even your world isn't going to have a cure for what I got. If I attack someone and spread it, then it's over.
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...Is it even a good idea to bring this next part up?]
My world isn't going to have a cure for you... yet. Your version of lycanthropy is... more like a curse than the one that exists in my world, to my understanding. But if it is more like a curse... There are people who spend their whole lives, and then their unlives besides, studying those. If there's any world that could have a cure for you... but finding it may not be pleasant.
[Eli would fight gods for him. He'd barter with whatever Chantry or Court or Tribe or Council who would see him for Eli, if need be.]
But... no matter where we are, your world or mine or anyone else's... I'll still hold to what I promised you here. I won't let you hurt anyone else. Just like I know you won't let me lose it and hurt someone.
no subject
I hate having to think through complicated shit.
[ Which is precisely what this is. ]
All we know is we want to be together, no matter where we end up. Why does the rest have to be hard? Then there's the whole "what do we do when I start getting old" thing we gotta think about.
no subject
[Usually, the complicated shit he has to deal with doesn't involve him so... directly. He can figure things out, can act coy when others are still struggling... and it's like a little game.
This? Not so much.]
...I could turn you. Or if we have access to my world, ask someone else with a clan more suited to you to do it.
[That... might be risky, if he's still a werewolf, but in the hypothetical future where he's cured? He'd make a good gangrel or brujah, he thinks.]
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The topic has moved on, though. It's almost a relief. The thought of becoming a vampire probably shouldn't be that, and yet! ]
I have thought about that, actually. I'm alive, so I figure it'd work even if I'm still a werewolf. Does a clan really matter that much?
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But the topic has moved on, and it's actually enough of a surprise that Eli's thought about it that Celeste straightens up a bit to really look at him before deciding that he'd rather stay nestled in close, actually, and settles back in.]
Mm... being a werewolf might cause something to go strangely in the embrace, but... if anything you'd make a new bloodline with its own quirks to figure out. And I'd be disowned by my own clan for saying so, but... it doesn't really matter much, no. There are different advantages and drawbacks to each, of course, but that's only worth thinking about should you decide to go through with it.
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[ But Celeste is right. It matters less until he actually decides to go through with it. He does let out a large, quiet sigh, however, big enough to be felt shoulder to shoulder as they are. ]
I'll definitely miss eating food, though...
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[He just said it didn't matter, but he's still flattered. He'll just have to make sure Eli sits in on the "What are the pros and cons of every option" meeting if McGillis decides to go through with it, too.
...And will have to put Gangrel and Brujah second and third.
The sigh sure is felt, though, and he nuzzles against Eli's hair in response.]
You could get lucky. Some can still eat food.
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[ He can hope and dream! But he says it mostly in jest. There's a chance, but only a chance, which isn't happening anytime soon. That aside, as Celeste nuzzles into his hair, he'll turn his face to bury it against Celeste's shoulder in turn. This muffles his words against the fabric of the vampire's shirt, but not too much. ]
But even if I don't, all I care is that it means I won't get old and die and leave you all alone, you know?
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[Even if it's not a wild new bloodline, maybe he'd just be blessed with the "Eat Food" merit. That would be nice. Then he wouldn't feel terrible about depriving Eli of all the fun treats the world - whatever world they may end up in - has to offer.
But then conversation shifts again, somewhat, and he's given pause.
He knows what Eli could be sacrificing. He knows what he would be sacrificing. And still he makes decisions like that like they're nothing.
So he takes full advantage of his face already being buried against his shoulder to shift himself, to wrap arms around him and hold tight, keeping him there in no small part so he can't see the pathetic, sappy mix of emotions on his face.]
Here I thought you'd have trouble topping the apple gift.
[This makes that look like it was nothing.]
But your life? Your eternity? You should have warned me you were a romantic.
[If you hear a slight waver in his voice, no you don't. He's keeping it together this time.]
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There's plenty else to consider when making that decision. He likes to think he can worry about those later. Adding those concerns to the most apparent one... their final home, whether they can jump between worlds or have to pick a single one... That's a little too much for Eli.
He still thinks the apples were better. ]
I mean, it just makes sense, right? [ Even with Celeste holding him tightly, he can still move his head enough to look up at him. ] You've already lost a lot of people. Doesn't seem fair to say I love you and then be another you have to lose.